C.S. Lewis quote

"You must picture me alone in that room in Magdalen, night after night, feeling, whenever my mind lifted even for a second from my work, the steady, unrelenting approach of Him whom I so earnestly desired not to meet. That which I greatly feared had at last come upon me. In the Trinity Term of 1929 I gave in, and admitted that God was God, and knelt and prayed: perhaps, that night, the most dejected and reluctant convert in all England. I did not then see what is now the most shining and obvious thing; the Divine humility which will accept a convert even on such terms. The Prodigal Son at least walked home on his own feet. But who can duly adore that Love which will open the high gates to a prodigal who is brought in kicking, struggling, resentful, and darting his eyes in every direction for a chance of escape?" C.S. Lewis

Elephants in Thailand

Elephants

My international business professor told me a story about an elephants in Thailand. I thought it was awesome. So I decided I'm going to become a mahout. These mahout's spend their entire lives with elephants. Sometimes the elephants even outlive their mahouts. (Elephants can live up to 80 years!)My professor is inspiring.

I'm probably not going to do it, but class doesn't get over for seven more minutes and I needed something to do with my mind.

An article

I read this article by Tony Woodlief on his blog Sand In The Gears.

I was going to link to his article, but I was afraid you wouldn't read it, so I copied and pasted. Hope that's legal.

By Tony Woodlief:

John Hinderacker at Powerline (I got there from Instapundit) has this observation about the latest slaughter of Christians in Nigeria:

“So where is the outrage? I don’t know what denomination those Nigerian Christians were, but Lutherans are the most numerous Christian denomination in Africa. I’m a Lutheran, but I have never heard a single word from any church source, local or national, about the mass murder of African Christians. No one seems to care.

No doubt readers can refer us to some Christian sources–evangelical, most likely–who have tried to draw attention to the plight of Christians in Africa, the Middle East and Asia who are being exterminated. But any such effort has wholly failed to gain traction in the “mainstream” Christian community.

Why? I can’t explain it. Maybe ‘mainstream’ Christianity is dead, except as an appendage of secular liberal opinion. Maybe, as the world’s largest religion, Christianity has become so diffused that New World Christians don’t much relate to their co-religionists in Africa and Asia. I don’t know. What I do know is that it is much more dangerous to publish a cartoon of Mohammed than to slice apart a Christian with a machete.”

I suspect most of us Christians living in the relatively safe West are here because we haven’t the faith or strength to be martyred like our brothers and sisters elsewhere. But do we have the faith and strength to remember them in more than a passing prayer?

As for the difference between Muslims and Christians on the point of violence, I don’t know what to say. They are called to force the world into bloody submission; we are called to turn the other cheek. They are called to strap bombs to the chests of their sons and daughters; we are called to obey the civil authorities.

Still, I don’t know how I could witness the slaughter of my family and friends without taking up a gun or blade or rock and spilling blood. Which is one reason why, I suppose, I live here and not there — because I haven’t the faith to die as these martyrs daily die.

Funny.

Basketball Prank

Soccer Prank

Forgotten or rejected?

Dear Lord,

You are real. I'm sure you are well-aware of that by now. I wish I was well aware of that. I wish I was more aware of that. I'm sure my actions would pain you far less.

Lord, what cuts deeper...

non-believers that reject you
or...
believers that forget you?

I bet both sting like nails. Do you remember the cross? Do you think about it still? Do you cringe when you see nails? Was that the worst pain you ever experienced? The sword they slashed into your side, The crown of thorns, the whipping, the bloodshed.

Which hurts worse:
The nails being driven into your hands
or...
The fact that I forgot you existed today?

I fear your answer.

Lord, I'm sorry.

I believe in you. I accept you; Your call, your will, your love. You are not forgotten tonight. I remember your love. Your pain. Your sacrifice. It lead me to here.

To this place.
To this conversation.
With you. In you.
And to this:

I love you too.

Extreme

One of my friends told me that I'm incredibly extreme in my personality, in my judgments and in my demeanor. He said, "There are great things about you being extreme, great good comes from it, but well...I'm glad I don't have to date you."I guess he was trying to say that I'm moody or something. Jerk.

At first I was offended.

And then a couple seconds later I was flattered.

Then, I realized he was right.

Discipline

A blonde-haired little boy came into the bakery today. His eyes were bloodshot and drooping, his cheeks were rosy red and his shoulders stooped low. His hands messily wiped a concoction of tears and snot from his face. His mother followed a few steps behind, she glanced at me while prodding her son through the doorway, her eyes told that today had been long for the little fellow. The boy looked up at me, pitiful, wide-eyed, craving mercy's kiss.

I smiled at the boy.

Only a few minutes had gone by before the mother could handle her discipline no longer; she embraced him and gently kissed him on the forehead.

I smiled again, I remember that feeling well.

A continuation from my last post...

Expendable God

What do you do when you are faced with the reality that the crap you are buying is expensive? Faced with the reality of the cost of which these purchases come to your parents.

If you are me. You try to pay for it.

You work, pull yourself up by your boot straps, stop living off your parents dime. Take some pride in yourself. Be Independent.

There’s a little nobility to it, don’t you think? I can respect that.

“I’ll work for my own crap. I don’t need to waste my parents money anymore. I spent so much money that I’m embarrassed. I Can’t let that happen again. I’ll work hard, day and night so that I won’t be a burden to them. I don’t want them to have to pay for this crap anymore.”

...I think they call that guilt.

When I was faced with the reality of the cost at which my crap has been paid for, the first thought out of my mind was

“I’m embarrassed.”

Then I thought about my father, and how much this must have hurt him

and I was ashamed.

Instead of asking my Father what he wants me to do, I do what feels right. I do what will redeem me in my Father's eyes. I make it right. I work for my stuff.

I work day and night, without rest, because I want to make it up to him. I want to pay him back for all the stuff I’ve bought. But no matter how hard I work, I can’t make enough to even cover the costs of the stuff I’m buying. I get depressed. I realize I haven’t seen my father in months. This is independence.I’m hopeless. Prideless.

I can't pay for this stuff.



...............................

I’m still not finished.

An Expendable God

God is so big. I think about him in his bigness all the time. He is bigger than the universe, which in itself has bewildered me. I am bewildered by the thought of God.

God is graceful. His grace is so big. So vast. He says he has covered all of my sins. Which were both big and vast. My sins are endless. Just as the Lord’s grace is endless.

Sometimes, I don’t try very hard because I know that God’s grace is so big it will cover everything I could, would, and will ever do. I would never actually say that out loud, of course, but I might write it down.

I fall short daily. And I’m a good Christian. (I would never actually say that either.) I can’t imagine how often the bad Christians fall short, let alone the non-christians. BAsed on my limited amount of research, I would estimate that the amount of people that screw up every day is astronomical. But not as large as the grace of God. Its bigger than the universe. I measured it.

Sometimes, I subconsciously think that my sin might go unnoticed. I know God is watching, but on the other hand, Its not like I’m the only one. I’m one of four billion. Its not like I’m the worst either. I figure as long as I just blend in with the rest of the sinners and don’t do anything evil to really separate myself from the pack--the grace will keep on flowing.

Paul talked a lot about how encompassing the grace of God was for the world. He knew that people like me would take advantage of it. Its easy to do when you can’t really see or feel the consequences.

Its like spending your parents money. You get what you want when you want it, but you have no concept of what the crap you’re buying actually costs. You may see the price tag, hand over the money, but you didn’t feel the cost. You didn’t feel the cost, because you didn’t work for the money. Your parents did. To you, the stuff is

free.

I haven’t finished this yet.